My discoveries of a long distance relationship have just begun, although it seems like an eternity since it began back on January 5th. I thought I had a grasp on what I could expect from being separated from my best friend. When I started asking for advice from my mother and my friends, there were rarely any tips that could apply to a relationship like this one. I want to aim this blog at charting my own journey, struggles, pains, and joys that can happen 1300 miles apart from my boyfriend while also helping those that might not have a fount of advice too.
Just some background info: my boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 2 years now, and we both were able to keep that relationship close to home. We lived in different neighboring cities most of the week because of school and life, which included little road trips often. We originally met at work where he was my superior. All crazy ideas aside, we were both on the same rank our second year, and that was that. Life was dandy.
He told me last September, almost a year and 6 months into our relationship, that him and his family were being relocated. He usually stuck around his military family wherever they went even though he was well on his way to establishing a life in Texas. He ultimately moved to pursue his career there close to L.A. and stay with his family. As overjoyed I was with his career possibilities, it broke my heart knowing he would be more than just a phone call away.
Over the next few months, I couldn’t stop thinking about the day he would leave, the things that would be different without him, and the endless possibilities of dating long distance – mostly negative. I think back about how much I dreaded that day, and now that it’s past, it’s a trivial thing in the bigger scale of the relationship.
I’m about 2 months into him being far away, but so far we are so good. Of course there are drawbacks: communication limits, time zones, way too much free time. Besides all of those and more, there is always that reassuring feeling that someone out there whom you completely love and admire is going through the same struggle as you.
I am personally religious, and I think about how the Lord is testing our relationship to see if it was really meant to be ours, or if there was someone else out there for me. I know we’ve gone through a lot of trials together, and this one is just another one of them. Being open, honest, and having those conversations are really essential to any relationship, near or far.
Finally, I’ll add a bit of advice, since this is where I’m going to share an actionable item: make a playlist of songs that reminds you of them, whether they like that type of music or not. It helps deal with emotions when you’re thinking too much. It can also serve as the soundtrack to this part of relationship in its journey. I have one which includes a song that helps me calm my fears about starting a long distance relationship. And since I’m a Lone Star gal, this is right up my alley.
“But the girls from Texas are just a little bit better.” Girls from Texas by Pat Green and Lyle Lovett
Cheers to LDR exploring!